Have you. - By Mar Garcia

Have you ever wondered, what would happen if you could let your mind free,
Ah, safely, I mean.
No one looking at you like a monster…
Because you’re not.
You look for love.
But not that love that gives you butterflies.
You’re not a teen anymore.
You look for that warm, liquid feeling,
That forces you to close your eyes,
And become so small,
In that embrace.

Because the scars in your body push you towards reality,
(Only in your body?)
Philosophy and radical ideals just… are not for you.
Because the fear you’ve been put through has stolen your mind.
And you look for a refuge.
You look for safety.
You look for a place to hide, so no one can burst into your safe place again.

It goes beyond physic.
Beyond… stereotypes.

That soul… that makes you feel like a piece of crystal.
You’re breakable. Yes, you are.
But it’s not a shame anymore.
Because you are so, so tired.
Exhausted.

But, it’s so difficult to talk.
To communicate.
You wander off in the world, like a lost kid in the woods.

Wondering why…
Why do you have to be at the height of expectations?
Of fierceness.
A shark?

Oh, I’m not…
I mean, you’re not.
My broken pieces all agree.
It’s time to go.
It’s time to hide.

Is it THAT bad, to want to curl up and hide underneath warmth?
Is it THAT bad, to give up fighting, and look for protection?
Is THAT bad, to decide you collected enough wounds?
That the world is a lie?
That nothing works as they told you?
That the fight is not worth it?
That… that your mind won’t… ever fit.

Is there someone who….?

Ah, never mind.